No wonder it is so hard for most traders to take losses. Look at how they treat themselves afterwards! What do most traders do? They make themselves wrong for not getting out earlier, for not following their rules, they put themselves down that they don't have what it takes etc etc etc. I am sure most of you know what I am talking about. I certainly do, in the past I have done it so many times, until I realised that this kind of behaviour is actually keeping me stuck.
My friend's little son used to spill his hot chocolate every single morning at breakfast and my friend used to get upset every single day about having to change the table cloth. One day she gave up. She decided not to put another table cloth as it would get spoilt anyway and when her little son spilled his hot chocolate again, she just laughed it off.
Guess what? From that day onward he never spilled anything again.
Today I can see it so clearly with most traders too. The harder they try NOT to repeat the same mistakes over and over again out of fear, the less control they seem to have over their impulses.
Instead of abusing and accusing yourself for being stupid and hurting how much money you have lost once again and if you only had followed your rules, how about look for one little thing that you did right.
Okay, you did let your account run 50% into a drawdown, and then you had to puke your position out of desperation. But hey, you did get out and didn't let your account blow up.
Say thank you to yourself, say well done for getting out [insert your name here], say I managed to do something well, that is progress and every day I will progress a little more.
Be kind to yourself, reward yourself for the smallest piece you did right, even if the trade was a stupid loss, it doesn't matter. Reward yourself with maybe a chocolate or a coffee and say to yourself, well done, I am so proud of you, I love you for that.
You will be surprised how grateful your little subconscious will be and it will thank you for being so much more willing to take those losses earlier, faster and with more certainty.
Try it.. you'll love the new you.
With a toast to your trading profits